why should telling others that you're furry be so hard/necessary?

[✡]

just a quick thought, why do we find telling others that we are furry be so tough/necessary? We treat it like an act of "coming out" like homosexuals do, though it doesn't seem nearly as necessary to do so.
Furry fandom is just a hobby, why is it important to tell others about your hobby like it's so important that others know? More importantly, why do we find it so hard to tell others? Is it some big embarrassment? Should we feel shame? Should we keep it secret for some reason?

okay I'm feeling really philosophical right now...

[Ares the Ram]

people have a negative stereotype about furs, the episode from csi and others, that makes it seem like we're "bad." When we tell others, we're afraid they might reject us, and thus makes it hard for us to tell them, because we dont want to lose them as friends. Thats what its like for me anyway.

[Alexei]

Well, I think it's simply human nature to want to feel welcomed and wanted and with some of the ways that furries have been portrayed in the past it's no suprise that some people have a tougher time telling others then they should have to.

I prefer not to tell others unless it actually comes up in the conversation that way it appears more like a casual thing then something to be worried about

For example:
Person 1: Hey there
Person 2:  Before we talk I need to let you know one thing
Person 1: Okay....
Person 2: I'M A FURRY!! THERE I SAID IT!!
Peson 1: 0_0

What seems more normal?

[WingedZephyr]

I think it mostly depends on how "into" the fandom you are. Browsing furry art in your spare time and maybe chatting with other furs may not be as big of a deal as if you go out fursuiting every weekend and travel to furry conventions all over the place and have furry art wallpapering your house. It might not be a big deal if no one around you has heard of furries before and doesn't really care, but it might be a bigger deal to you if you're surrounded by people who are trolling and hating on the fandom all the time. Many kinds of people are "furry", but some make it a bigger part of their life than others.

Just depends on people's personal situations, really.

[✡]

Well, I think it's simply human nature to want to feel welcomed and wanted and with some of the ways that furries have been portrayed in the past it's no suprise that some people have a tougher time telling others then they should have to.

I prefer not to tell others unless it actually comes up in the conversation that way it appears more like a casual thing then something to be worried about

For example:
Person 1: Hey there
Person 2:  Before we talk I need to let you know one thing
Person 1: Okay....
Person 2: I'M A FURRY!! THERE I SAID IT!!
Peson 1: 0_0

What seems more normal?

but I think that hobbies like the fandom are just a normal part of life, why is furryness more on people's radar then for example liking sports?

[WingedZephyr]

Because people generally aren't teased or made fun of for liking sports. In our society, liking sports is usually considered a good and healthy thing. Furries are often seen as twisted and perverted... even when that may not be true.

[✡]

I just see so many similarites
sports people dress like sports players, have sports photos all over, go to sports cons (games I would guess?)
furries dress like furries, have furry pictures, go to furcons...

I guess I understand where you're coming from

[Alexei]

but I think that hobbies like the fandom are just a normal part of life, why is furryness more on people's radar then for example liking sports?

For most it's simply a hobby but for some it can turn into a fullscale lifestyle choice, the media tends to fours on such people and since so little is known about our relatively small fanbase many people will start making generalizations about the fandom because they didn't do the research because let's be honest, if someone did see something on T.V. like that they probably wouldn't go wasting their time searching about furries, they'd most likely take the show's word for it.

So my overall outlook on it is that even casual users will become somewhat uneasy about "Coming out" because they're afraid to be associated with the furries that are featured in the mainstream media.

The reason people with other hobbies usually have no problem with telling others is because a overall "Good" generalization has been adapted by the public eye.

[Self-sain]

Drake those are two diffrent things, sports are in every society, and a general pass time, its universally accepted.

Just like with furs, picture a crossdresser, they may like it, they don't have to be totally perverted, but if you just go hey I'm a cross dresser you'll get a lot of looks, and you might want to tell someone your close to or something because they might go through you closet one time and be all like, "jeans, sports T, mini skirt, trip pants... WHAT THE HECK MINI SKIRT!!"

[Puncia]

I prefer not to tell others unless it actually comes up in the conversation that way it appears more like a casual thing then something to be worried about

I actually side a lot with this, I see no reason why I should make it a big deal. It's just like my sexuality. Only tell if it comes natural to the conversation. It kinda removes the taboo around it I feel. Instead of going "Guys, there's something I have to tell you" *serious face is serious*, you just mention it if asked as if it's the most natural thing in the world. Might come a little surprisingly at the second it happens but it will not be half as bad as if you act like you're gonna tell them you have cancer and Parkinson's combined.

And yeah I also think that it's more of a hobby for most people. Remember that news report last summer about the teenagers that swore they were wolves and wore little fake tails and howled and played around like that? Most act it out through the Internet because it's safe, easy, you have the freedom and it's all you need to act out that or those side(s) of your personality. I would sure love to attend a con (suited), at some point. I have said that for years even though being a furry is completely new to me right now. But I feel that I am a human with a furry side of me, not the other way around.


Wow, I should stop making forum posts when I just woke up...

[armagre]

my friends always knew i liked animals and did nothing but draw them so when i told them they were all "your furry?" and thats all
im still friends and i didnt change anything except some furjokes now and then but its fine

my dad was also cool with it, as long as it didnt get too 'over done' i donno what he means by that but if hes fine with that then...cool !

other people know im fur too and make fun of me, im always called weird before joining the fandom so it was nothing new to me and im not bothered by it.

I can see why it is hard sometimes for some people to in a way 'come out of the closet' to some people or it just pop up cause people are like children, very mean to thoughs that are different. Some go out of the way to make that person miserable all because there different.
I see furs attacking back with comments and kinda shake my head at the whole thing. If the person doen't like what some one is, why do you bother making drama trying to change there mind... its kinda a wait of time *i normally turn it into a joke some how, they go away faster*

Anyway back to the point. It shouldn't be so hard to tell your friends that you are fur, just dont go up to them and tell them and just leave thats more of a shock.
Kinda just give them hints for a while (if you REALLY wanted them to know) and then talk about furries in a way and see what they think about them
I used talked about making fun of furries as they are weird or something (doesnt really think there weird) to see if they went along, if they did dont tell them, if they dont make fun of them with you, then consider telling them, thats how i broke the ice with dad.

[Aoren Deringer]

The way I see it (and I'm going to keep this short and sweet) it is a coming out, simply do to the fact that it is a part of who you are. Its your life and its a popular idea to have those close to you be knowledgable about you (otherwise they dont seem so close) and the reason its tough is because of the persom doing it. Most peoples big, negative reaction is in your head, and it usually doesent come out that way.

Heh.

[icy wolf]

I agree with WZ , i dont like sports and according to some people thats "not normal" or what man doesn't like sports are what some people have said. i tell people iam a furry because iam proud of it even though its a hobby. the same thing with likening amine and manga but thats more "accepted " then beeing a furry.  i would love to go to a fur con with some furrys but its still a hobby not going to get a fur suit for that, maybe just ears and a tail peace. the same with anime con the only thing is that i know some people that love amine too and will go ... they don't have cos play costumes and i dont ether ...sorry for rambling ... i guess the point iam trying to make here is

some people find it harder then other to tell people about the fandom because of  the dam media and how it makes it look bad and how people are to lazy to look in to it and believe what they see on tv. the resin  why i tell a lot of people and have it on my rl fb that iam a furry and a threian is because iam differnt and i dont like it when people think iam the same as every one else... and when i try to clear up the neagtive stuff about the fandom i hope that it will have an effect on people and when they hear something neagtive the will look it up, not just the fandom but every thing else as well.

[CrimsonEtClover]

I'm new here, and I was noticing that - the way you compare it to coming out for gays. I was shocked when I realized that most of the ppl who were talking that way were NOT furverts - it seems like there is something they feel they would be ostracized for, even though they don't do anything remotely furrverted. There is nothing to explain to anybody. Even if you wear ears and a collar! Is it really such an issue? Maybe I've never cared what people think?

*off to read other responses*

*very curious*

[icy wolf]

i where a collar when no one is around ... last time i wore one to school people lafughed at me.