The Bad Advice Game

[Captain Degenerate]

Stab it, if that doesn't work just get a new one 

Where should I go out to eat?

That Chinese place with the dingey lighting of course!




How should I get out of bed in the morning?

[Michen_S]

You shouldn't, you should order someone to make your bed remote-controlled instead.

How often do my plants need water?

[?]

Only when they ask 


What the coziest spot to nap in? 

[Malina]

next to an active volcano, nice and warm


How many cups of tea should I make to satisfy a Brit?

[?]

Give them one cup but if they ask for more, inform them that you are all out and run away 

I do I become a shiny?

[Michen_S]

Shove a lamp up your nose.

How do I find water in a desert?

[?]

Eat the sand, it will tell ya 


Someone is trying to catch meh, how to I prevent this?

[Ara Av-Toa]

Lock yourself up.


How do I find a lost key?

[?]

Burn everything! It will turn up eventually 




How do I use a oven?

[Captain Degenerate]

If its not burning the rest of the house down its not cooking if you cant take the heat get out of the kitchen!




How do I operate a phone?

[?]

You gotta use a pen! 

How do I battle?

[Ara Av-Toa]

I read somewhere a plushie makes a great weapon. The softer, the better.


How can I avoid a burnt dish?

[?]

Just put it in the freezer and don't cook it, no way you can burn it now 


How do I cure a cold?

[Ventus Fall]

By sitting in a fire

How do I get to bed earlier?

[Bricket]

Get into a come, then you would never have to worry about waking up or getting earlier in bed.


How do I get a promotion at my job?