Rants: Everyday Venting

[Ventus Fall]

How much did you get, how much do you need, and how much do you think you can get in the summer retakes? (If you don't mind me asking.)

As of which, another vent from me:
-I can't get through the front door because of what happened in November (which is bullshizzle what happened), so I'm already anxious of getting outside (which I didn't use to be) because I don't have the front door key anymore. It feels wrong and the whole ordeal is retarded why I don't have the key.
-I need to do certain things today but first need to get outside. Which I'm postponing because of the first reason (albeit it I'm finally getting ready to go out, I'm still postponing it).

Thus getting nowhere because I ened to get outside first.
ARGH.

[Bricket]

 
How much did you get, how much do you need, and how much do you think you can get in the summer retakes? (If you don't mind me asking.)

The amount of lost credits will be 20, I can try to pick them up in the summer.
The max amount of credits I now can gain is 14 which will bring my total to 21

[Ventus Fall]

So if you would happen to pass all, there is a chance you can do the full second semester anyways?
If that's so, you'd still have a chance (small or not) to get it.

[Bricket]

I checked it, it's going to be hard for me to go for the extra 20 original credits since well; I've been a mental wreck for a few weeks now.
See it like a car that's at the end of his cycle, you can push it but you also know that when you push it it will break down and won't start again

[Ventus Fall]

True, it'll be hard, but (and I'm sure you will) try your best. I think with that analogy you might want to have a car mechanic nearby then!
But understandable regardless...


If you would like to talk about this further or more personally, feel free to PM me

[Bricket]

Would love to but this brings me another rant I've had: due to all these events in the past I just can't trust people 

[The Magic Otter]

I'm tired, I'm tired of my friends not wanting to spend time with me, not wanting to talk to me or not wanting anything to do with me outside of college.
I'm tired of being alone when my friends boast about being otherwise, yet they don't understand when I tell them that they aren't in the same situation as me, when I tell 'em that them having constant contact with friends (and other people) who enjoy their company or who have people who have feelings towards them is the complete opposite of what I have.
I'm sick of it all, every time I even bring up the fact that they treat me like crap they attack me and act like I'm treating them badly.
It just all is culminating into a large ball of despair
All in all:
It's making me worse in mental health and worse in physical health.

[SkinFlake The Goat]

even thou I live rent free and didn't run out of money after getting fired from one job and hired at another. I don't think I could ever quit unless they made me ship bad parts. ive spend too many years in my youth being a lazy bum and I want to make money and buy stuff and pay bills to prove I'm not a failure...

if you have the guts to quit and move on to something better I have great respect for you.

[Bricket]

Sorry for the vagueness in advance.
Long story short: I blurted a dark deep hidden secret out to someone during a discussion.
Now this person used it immediatly against me and acted really smug about it.
I know I said it alot that I don't trust people, but the fact I blurted a deep secret out and that I immediatly got backstabbed from it makes me feel weak and for the matter of fact: I'm just done.

[Grey]

I had to redo all my learning support paperwork because the college lost it. Not a huge issue, but slightly irritating. At least they allowed me to redo it rather than not telling me.

[Bricket]

Welp, time to go to my dad to "celebrate" the new year and stuff.
Maybe if I'm lucky I wont get shouted at my head or make it out without being put in danger

[Ori]

I'm going back to college soon, and I have to admit, I'm really nervous. New class/ new people ya know? Not healthy for my fear of people and crowds ;-; Especially Japanese class, I kinda wonder what kind of crowd I will attract there. (Well possibly. Hopefully there's another person that speaks Japanese in my class to help split the crowd.) But basically, I speak Japanese, I'm african and Japanese, I've been there ten times, and I love anime and games. Most people will probably be curious and  come talk to me. See... that 'most' people I'm thinking about is what scares me. A couple people isn't so bad, but when it's over that I hit my limit ;-; I wish I can wring out the more wild side of me and just be more upbeat and talkative rather than fearing each and every social gathering. Unfortunately I'm the type that if I'm brought to a club I just go towards the darkest corner of the room ;-;. I just hope I can take the crowd well... I mean it's not like when 10 people walk up to me I can raise my hands up and say WAIT WAIT WAIT! Guys please step back, I don't take lots of people in my personal space well. That just makes me sound weird as most social people don't quite understand why it bothers us when there are crowds. And the next sad thing is, if we introduce our selves, I have a stage persona. ;-; It makes no sense. If I'm put in the spot light I can talk more or less. But if it's a crowd of people 'conversing' or ' socializing' I can't do it. So it's like hey you seemed so sociable what happened there?! Weird.
(The worst part is, I can't vent about it in IRL. Not a single friend knows about my fear of crowds and people, and most people I don't trust enough to admit it to... Well I lied, one person does know. Kinda.) But they're not the type I vent to.

[Vortex Cynbel]

Ugh honestly I am back at school.. first day.. first class.. after holidays and I have a test >__< :p Hewp meh!


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[Rocco Rex]

Today went great, ended very bad. Very, very bad

[The Magic Otter]

Once again I'm faced with the revelation that when I'm offline everyone seems to dislike me.
The friends I made the first day of college are pushing me away, not even talking to be for weeks on end unless they have to for work.
As usual everyone looks at me with some sense of either indifference or disgust, which doesn't help me find a romantic involvement in college, nor does the fact that everyone I've met offline thinks I'm both ugly and obnoxious.
Anyway, I don't find said person in college I'll not be able to see them on most days as I can't leave the house unless forced by someone, not to mention the fact that I wouldn't want to tell my family why I had to go if the person helped me leave the house, that's because I hate them mentioning that kind of stuff every ten seconds, it's embarrassing.
All in all: I'm being abandoned by my friends and I'll never get a significant other because of the fact that I'm ugly and obnoxious and not fun as I can't go out and get pissed or something.