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Author Topic: I'm straight up lonely.  (Read 739 times)

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Offline Ravenshade

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I'm straight up lonely.
« on: June 16, 2016, 08:40:01 PM »
No sugarcoating it. I'm just alone. I have what are called fair-weather friends, which means that someone is only your friend on a certain day depending on the weather. (Not literally, but I'm sure you understand.) One day, I talk and actually am relieved of the constant cloud of depression. The next day? A black storm. Outside of family, I really don't talk to anyone. Normal, everyday conversation I mean. Emotional conversations? Never. Now, for those of you who saw Zootopia, you may remember this quote from Nick. "From that day onward, I'd never let people see that they get to me." That's one of my favorite quotes. It applies to me, in almost every way. It's a good quote to live by, too. In my case, of course. Now, 'You're not alone'...that's a lie. No one tell me it isn't, because I have a counter argument for everything. No one cares, no one wants to. I have no friends, no one wants to be. No one understands, no one ever will. I've reached out, nope. I've tried my utmost and very best, no avail. I'm done trying. If there's some freak out there who understands me, they'd better reach out to me, because I won't reach out to people. Not anymore. Never again. It's like adding 2 + 2 and wanting to get 5. No. It always be 4. Always.
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Offline Ventus Fall

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Re: I'm straight up lonely.
« Reply #1 on: June 16, 2016, 09:00:38 PM »
Hey there, Ravenshade.
Reading this whole post... how to word it? Let's just say I often had similar thoughts, of not exactly the same.
Why keep trying when you keep being betrayed? Or people don't believe you? Or whatever seems to be the case, people either 'leave' you/let you be or don't seem to trust you.
Am I getting close?


When, however, I feel happy/neutral, there is one stronger thought: To keep on trying.
Because, to me, that is what life is about. To keep on trying. Even if in the end one gets hurt in some manner, the moments that you do feel happy, are so worth it. At the time you're happy, etc. This are moments to strive for. Not to give up on. Even if it feels it happens every single time that you 'fail' or 'lose' in some way. Don't give up.
In the end, Nick opened up to Judy. There is two ways to look at his quote. The first one you already mentioned. Another one is what I like to hold on to the most: When bad stuff happens, I indeed don't show it gets to me. If I happen to be able to talk to someone about it, I'll surely do. Otherwise I keep to myself. But when good stuff happens, in general, I just enjoy it. I usually don't show ecstasy or the like from the start, I build it up.


And I also try to remember I do have friends. Online and offline. Friends, acquaintances, etc. I usually help my friends, but in turn if I have a problem, I can go to them. (This is also what separates my real friends from any fake friends I might come across. Real friends will stay by you if you have a problem, fake ones pretend they want to listen to your problems, but then actually just decide to leave or complain about the problems you're having. That is, taking into account, if you're not down/having a problem 24/7 whenever you meet up with your friends or other people. No one wants to be around a depressed person the whole time, afterall.)

Maybe I've written too much, and the like. I feel I haven't really gotten to the point. My main point is to not stop trying. I know it sounds cliché, but a lot of cliché's are there for a reason.
Either way, I hope in some way this helps.

Take care, Ravenshade.


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Offline Ræfóa Aldrnari

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Re: I'm straight up lonely.
« Reply #2 on: June 16, 2016, 09:18:25 PM »
Hey Raven


I have to say, that I know the feeling. I understand what you're going through. I felt it a lot back in the day, and I felt horrible. People at my school seemed to be friends with me, but I never felt like they actually were, and one of them even admitted that he enjoyed being with the others more than he enjoyed being with me. Then around this year (when I joined the forum), I learned to be more happy. And you can too. You may, or may not, have heard this a lot before, but: Happiness is a choice. I know, I know, it sounds stupid, but hear me out: Bad things happen to everyone. Heck, it happens to me a lot too. But if you learn to ignore those bad things, and focus on the good things, then you'll see that life isn't that bad afterall! By doing this, I have also learned to be more independent, socially. I still talk to my classmates, and it goes fine, but we never get into those deep, friend-like conversations. We're just sorta... school-friends, to put it that way. We never really hang out after school, and we never really bring problems up to each other. And I'm fine with that. There are people out there that can help you, and tonnes of them are here on the forum. Even though they're there, though, it doesn't mean they'll be able to help out all the time. As Ventus said: No one wants to be around a person that's always depressed. So, whenever you feel down because you feel like you don't have any friends, try to think of other things. Try to think of us. We're always here for you, or at least, some of us are. I actually made a thread on the matter. I put in some things to help you out, when you feel socially alone. I put in some things that I do, and I figured more people might want to use those. I'll send a link if you think you could make use of it (it seems to have been locked because of no activity, but still. It's there for you, and to anyone, to read): https://www.thefurryforum.com/forums/index.php?topic=32823.0


All in all, I just want to say, I'm here for you. If you ever need anyone to talk to, just hit me up. I'm ready to support you, but also learn to be more independent. That's important :)
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Re: I'm straight up lonely.
« Reply #3 on: June 17, 2016, 12:06:49 AM »
Believe me, comrade, I know how you feel. I've felt that way before. I still feel that way. Like you'll always be alone for what you are. Because you are you.

But there are people who care. Look at the responses. These are people that care, as I am. I know what it's like to feel what you feel. It's never easy feeling that way. Harder still is bearing it. Even harder never to talk about it, because you feel others will neither understand nor care. I know what all of it feels like. To be alone. To have friends that don't seem to care. I've been holding on for ten years, reaching out to others, hoping they will care. No one ever truly deserves to be alone. No one.

One of the quotes I try to remember in times like this, is, "Everything that has a beginning has an end." It would also tie into "No darkness lasts forever." The point? You won't feel this way forever. Either you will reach out to someone - whether you try to or not - or they will reach out to you. You'll find someone, or they'll find you, and care enough to show they care. That you are not alone. There are people in this world who feel as you do. I know. I'm one of them. You may feel alone - and I know what that's like - but you are not truly alone.

And even with the way you feel, you can always remember that there are others who feel worse. If nothing else, take consolation in that your situation is not any worse than it is now. Some people really are alone with nothing and no one. You are not such a person, because you have this community to talk to - people who want to be your friends. When I feel alone and depressed, I come here, I talk to those that will listen. There are such people here.

You're not alone, comrade. We all have your back.
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Offline Salakar Crocoli

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Re: I'm straight up lonely.
« Reply #4 on: June 18, 2016, 04:43:30 PM »
I'm not going to write a wall of text. All I want to say is let us be your escape. I have been in the same situation as you, and having 1 good friend changed everything. It's a terrible place to be, so let us help you out of it.
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Offline sekhmut

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Re: I'm straight up lonely.
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2016, 03:39:56 PM »
purrs and nuzzles you.
some of us just done know how to do the freinds thing.
can not even spell it!
only friends (look't it up) I had ware the ones would bullied me.
if not for that I would have had no one at all!

I dont like humans. I love animals. they ware my brothers and sisters as I grew up.
now I have a adopted girl. a alsatian. we keep each other happy.
maybe thats why I am what I am!

you look beautiful in your pic. but I do love leopards the most.
I would like to be your friend. but I am very quiet.
nothing to do with the weather. just depression.
and leopards are not a pack animal. um! ok I have my daughter.
purrrrr.

 

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