Trixsie's odds and ends

[Trixsie Vixen]

I can't comprehend
The horrific thing you did
Not for love, not for hate
Not dogma, not faith
Not to protect nor desecrate
If you were off your head
Subhumanised on meth
At least I could rationalise
As I considered your death
That would not make it right
Walking the streets at night
But you were just bored
So you chose to bait
A simple, weak, vulnerable soul
Not even looking for a fight
You pathetic, worthless arsehole
All you wanted was to cause pain
Now I do too, which is insane
I will not stoop to your low pit
But when your Hell comes
I hope you rot in it

[Tim Siguire]

Mum..... I dont quite understand, it feels.... backwards. A nice warm lap and a hug sounds nice. Like it could make the problems go away for a moment.

[drakewithout]

i like the use of assonance, the staccato rythem was a nice touch to, someones a bit peeved it seems

[Trixsie Vixen]

Cheers Drake, definitely reflecting my fragmented state of mind.  I sorta went for a take a rhyming poem then drop the pages and pick them up partially shuffled vibe to get the assonance without the doggerel I normal prefer

[Trixsie Vixen]

I just wanted you to be happy
For you to find love
Wanted to be a support
An escape, a surprise, a laugh

Sibling teased, thought me on a bawdy hunt
But I teased him back
A fine joke I smirked
He would never crack my lark

I got my wish I was all those things
Sooner than I had dreamed
And those things too
I wished for you, came to be

The pictures, mundane, that he assumed
Their substitution, gold
You gave to me and bade me
Spin this to straw, my clown

So I jigged my jig, japed my japes
And you clapped and laughed
Showered me with joy
Then went back to your dreams

Then my turn came and I looked to you
You danced the required steps
Spake the minimum text
Again then, back to your dreams

So I sat alone patting my back
Congratulating my victory, now dark
Your dreams turned to the light
As the tears ran down my heart

[Tim Siguire]

So Beautiful. So very beautiful. The sentences have more than one context in a few instances and it feels so bi-personal. Reflective of what the other person was feeling besides just you. It's deep, beautiful, and at the end.. a bit sad.

[Trixsie Vixen]

That, young Tim, is me in a nutshell: deep, beautiful and, in the end a bit sad 

But thanks none-the-less.

[drakewithout]

the changing use of tense and voice brings to mind T,S Eliot, very provocative.

[Trixsie Vixen]

**censor** you! **censor** you!
And your little dog too!
What a world, what a world
Stupid, needy, puppeteer girl
You take and take
You're so **censor** fake!
Then you go to a place
For extra fake for your face
Oh my God, you're a meme
"I need attention" you scream
Like being fake is some great duty
And we owe you for your beauty
Well enough is enough
And if this sounds a bit rough
You simply cannot measure
What I've offered in treasure
What harvest you've reaped
Because I sacrificed sleep
So that morning and night
I could shine a fresh light
On the dark of your soul
But that dark is a hole
Just an ever hungry void
For emotions with which you've toyed
You suck, you suck!
And don't give a **censor**
About that which you take
The wreckage strewn in your wake
So I quit, I quit!
I renounce all your shit
And you just give me that smile...


...and it all is worth while
Just forget what I said
I'm all up in my head
Honestly, don't worry
Forgive me. Please? I'm sorry

[drakewithout]

i reads rather choppy, but i like the wording and voice

[Trixsie Vixen]

Kinda like a steam valve!

[Tim Siguire]

I like how escalated it starts, like when you are really mad at someone but don't mean what you say.
Even though what you said is right, you want to be wrong.
That way you can enjoy what you don't get from that someone.

[Trixsie Vixen]

Wise words Tim.

[HyenaKing]

**censor** you! **censor** you!
And your little dog too!
What a world, what a world
Stupid, needy, puppeteer girl
You take and take
You're so **censor** fake!
Then you go to a place
For extra fake for your face
Oh my God, you're a meme
"I need attention" you scream
Like being fake is some great duty
And we owe you for your beauty
Well enough is enough
And if this sounds a bit rough
You simply cannot measure
What I've offered in treasure
What harvest you've reaped
Because I sacrificed sleep
So that morning and night
I could shine a fresh light
On the dark of your soul
But that dark is a hole
Just an ever hungry void
For emotions with which you've toyed
You suck, you suck!
And don't give a **censor**
About that which you take
The wreckage strewn in your wake
So I quit, I quit!
I renounce all your shit
And you just give me that smile...


...and it all is worth while
Just forget what I said
I'm all up in my head
Honestly, don't worry
Forgive me. Please? I'm sorry

Mind if I turn this into a song, Trix?

[Trixsie Vixen]

Sure Vulpy, knock yourself out!