Skree's Vents (advice can be shared)

[Sareen]

A thread for me to post my vents, since im at a bad time right now and need to vent out allot of stuff.
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Vent #1: Depression

When you love someone, Show Them...People Walk into our lives everyday, but only certain ones leave a footprint...Everyone will hurt you some when along the line but you need to be strong and pick the ones who are worth the pain, because the ones who aren't, there will be a reason they never made to your future...And when everything hurts and you feel like crying, just cry, it doesn't make you weak, it makes you human, it proves you care. If you have lost someone very dear to you, to either a stupid mistake or death, don't forget, there not gone, their still with you...Maybe not in person but in mind and spirit, Your never alone when you truly feel it, you will always have an angle standing by, guarding you, you wont feel it but when your truly in need of someone, they wrap there arms around you and shield you with their wings. I know some people may just think what I'm writing is stupid, it maybe, but i don't mind, this is just what i have learnt and be told, I'm always told to keep my chin up when everything has gone wrong and that I'm never alone. Even though I feel completely helpless right now and like I don't have a reason to cry, but I do, I know my reason is pathetic compared to others because i know someone somewhere is dealing with a lot worse then I am, so please don't say I'm trying to over shine everyone with this, because I'm not. Just remember, when you feel alone and upset, just close your eyes, take a deep breath and relax, if you need to  cry then cry, because bottling it up never helps, it can make the next problem seem worse when it really isn't, and remember your guardian angle is right beside you, protecting you.

[Ares the Ram]

i wish i could cry. break down my walls and let it out. i fear if i do, ill hurt someone really bad. i really hope i find someone to help me let it out, if you know what i mean.

[Sareen]

yeah i know what you mean, but all you gotta do, is cry, i might be hard to, but just let it out, bottling it up makes it a lot worse. I normally just cry in my room, and blare music to cover it up, i feel tons better after letting it all out.

[Armalite_]

I havent felt sad in a long time. Over the years I find myself bottling up only seething rage and hate. Crying isn't something I do unless I'm stressed to the point where I feel trapped and hopeless. Otherwise, I try to take my mind off of it by doing things that I enjoy like playing guitar or dirtbiking. Yes, people constantly enter your life and sometimes, they are important to you but it is also important to remember that no one sticks around forever. Sometimes, it's like they disappear off the face of the Earth. They could be there one day and gone the next. I know it sucks but the only way I deal with it is by preparing for when it happens and knowing how I'll react.

[Sareen]

Vent #2: Confusion/Upset
(before anyone may think I have lost someone to death I haven't, I lost a Mate To a stupid mistake I made)

I'm no longer myself, I've changed, I don't know if its for the better or for the worst...But if you see how am now, would you feel pity? would you laugh? or would you simply walk away?. I never used to be this way...When I lost someone, i would just hold my head high and shake of the depression and move on with my life without a second thought...But you...You made it harder to forget you, you left your own special print on me...I Dream about you, Do you care?...I Sit on my window sill at night, staring at my bed...It looks so...Empty without you. I miss you?...Do you miss me to? or am I just faded memory in the back of your mind?...I still remember the first day we met, the stories i was told about the night you went home...How you said you thought you liked me...Even though we hardly talked that first day...I miss it...I Miss You...I miss everything we used to be, how we used act towards each other...But that's the past...done and forgotten...those memories never left my mind...I carry them with me till this day...They still put a smile on my face...But they bring tears to my eyes as well...I'm just so confused...should i be happy that your happy? or should i be sad for the fact that I've lost you?...

[Ares the Ram]

/sit
cant really say anything about this one, as ive never experienced such feelings, but ill sit and listen so you have someone to talk to at least.

[Armalite_]

It's one thing to make a mistake and it's another thing to do something on purpose. Maybe try to talk things out with your mate? Talking with them could give you closure or even could get you back together if you play your cards right. So far, I think I've been lucky with my gf. We've had so many fights and I've screwed up so many times but in the end it's always turned out for the better.

What are you looking for Nix? You have to know what'll make you feel better. If you absolutely know that what you've done has little hope of getting you back together then maybe all you need is forgiveness.

[Sareen]

Vent #3: Worry/Upset

Im scared Im gunna lose you...You say i wont but your not the same...You say its me, but its just like you dont care like you used to, you seem more interested in spending time with your friends, you never seem to care that you see me less and less...Your always so eager to leave and go home or go with your friends...I just dont know what to do, im scared if i tell you, your going to think i'm stopping you from seeing friends...I'm not, I just wish I had more time to see you...You say all these things, like you will always love me and that you miss me, But you never show that you miss me, you hardly say you love me any more, to you going for a run is more fun then talking to me?...you have no idea how much that hurt to hear, you talk to other girls more then you talk to me, I get like 2-3 texts in a day whilst other girls get full on conversations with you, I try to talk to you but you seem to want to end it. I cry a lot you know? Do you care that I do? would you come and comfort me? or would you just stay home where you know you can do whatever you like and forget about me whilst you talk to other girls? you have no idea how much I'm missing you, I tell you how much i miss you but I never get it back, you never tell me the things you used to, you seem to be drifting further away from me, please dont go...I love you so much...I just want to go back to how we were, when you used to phone and text me everyday just to tell me you loved me...not to brag about how much fun you had out with your friends...You never tell me you had fun with me...Are you just using me? are you cheating on me? or are you just falling out of love with me?

[Ares the Ram]

there, there. itll be alright. would you like one of my peanut butter cookies? they always help me ease the pain. I'll just leave it here if you want one. (#) there ya go.

[Sareen]

Vent #4: Standing up for myself/Acceptance
(the recent spilt with my mate made me realise a lot of things)

Who am I? I dont know anymore...I used to be happy-go-lucky, I used to control myself...But since that one day...The day he left our family...I was broken and distorted...He made me this way, The way I am now...I feel I'm unable to open up to those who love and care for me as Im afraid to lose them, I'm expecting the worst all the time since I have a worried mind...I have done many things in my life that I regret with a passion and it tears my apart just thinking about it, i think...How could I do that?...Why?...All I was hurt a lot of people in the prossess...unfortunately my mind still gets the better of me, I destory everything good in my life...I dont want to...I want to be that girl I used to be, the one who someone could be proud of, the one that thought before she said...The one who could hold on to the things that mattered and let go of the things that didnt...I lose someone I truely love because of my stupid mistakes...I just wish i could change the way I am...But years of pain and betrayel have hurt me a lot...But now...Heres where it happens...I'm letting go of the things that hurt me, the people that lied and betrayed me...Those things are no long important...Im older now, I should be more mature, not the stupid child I am now...I'm letting go of the past once and for all...From this day on I'm living each day like its my last, im going to better myself and tell all those who try to make me the stupid fool I am, to ''Kiss My Bum, Sugar Plum''...Since at the end of the day The past is history, tomorrows a mystery and today is the present, so live it to the full...this is MY life and im going to live it how I want to, Im going to become the person I once was, the one who treats those of deserve it with respect, Im going to appreciate what I have because one day I might not. Today is the day I say Goodbye to the past and Hello to the Future.