Love and its problems

[Umber]

So I have a large conundrum.
I like/love a guy (lets name him Chad)and he returned the feelings which sounds great only there is a catch that he already has a girlfriend. He and I have been intimate despite knowing about the other girl. The other girl lives several states away so I wasnt bothered. Chad went to see his girlfriend over Spring break and while he was there she found out about me liking him. She snapped and now he and I cant hang out(she doesnt know about his cheating). Despite knowing this he still hangs out with me, he still kisses me, but now he doesnt say how he feels and doesnt spend as much time with me because he says hes busy. I know most of the time that he is 'busy' he is off LARPing with friends, working or school. He's rarely online anymore and he doesnt watch me on FA anymore either. I dont know if he is just being cautious because of his girlfriend or if hes losing interest in me. He hasnt said hes lost interest, but I really dont know what to think. Im hanging out with Chad on Thursday but I really dont know what to do about him anymore. When Im with him I feel great, when I am without him I feel aweful.

In the meantime I have a developed feelings toward a friend Ive known since Middleschool(mind you Im in college) that Ive been hanging out with a lot recently. He has been having on and off problems (breakup/getbacktogther) with his girlfriend recently. I dont know if he just cares for me as a friend or more, but I wonder if Im finding him more attractive because he spends time with me where as the other guy doesnt so Im seeking attention elsewhere.

Lastly there is a guy who is about 3 years older than me who has a genuine interest in me. I like him but he came on too strong and due to that scared me away more than anything else. Im thinking about hanging out with him and getting to know him more and seeing how I feel. Hes the most emotionally stable guy Ive come across, but my feelings arent as strong as they probably should be... not as strong as with Chad. 

What do you all think I should do? I've been patient with Chad for a month or so, my friend from middleschool is a semi-new development, and the older guy I dont have as stong interest in but there is potential.

Opinions, advice and the like are appreciated.

[WingedZephyr]

Forget about all of them and find a new guy.

Nah, I know that isn't a choice you're likely to take, so I'll give you some other advice.

Leave Chad alone to work out his issues. Either break it off completely, or at least tell him to come back when he's NOT taken.

I don't advise getting into anything at all with the friend from middle school. A) He obviously either has commitment issues or is not over his girlfriend, If he is still with his girlfriend when you try to pursue him, he's just going to end up like the situation with Chad. Personally, I wouldn't touch that one with a ten foot pole.

As for the third guy, I'm not sure what I should say since "came on too strong" has a pretty wide spectrum of definitions. If he seems to mean well, it doesn't seem like too bad of an option.

But of course, this is my opinion just based on what you've told us. I may not be accurate, and you're welcome to take my advice or to leave it.

[kayle]

I have a bit of a bad history with love, so my advice may not be the best.  However, if you feel like listening, I'd say give guy no. 3 a chance.  Though that's just a guy's P.O.V.

[Umber]

The thing with the third guy is that he came around after I found Chad. He was pushy in telling me to leave Chad alone and go off with him, he was kinda pushy in having me with him, which scared me off, made me nervous. He also works with Chad so that obviously is going to cause problems.

Another thing that makes me wonder if it would work is that he got a girlfriend and broke up with her after about a month. He described some of the reasons he broke up with her like some of her personality inadequecies, and some of them are how Im like so I wonder if it would work anyway. Ive told him I do similar things and he just says "You're being silly" when, in reality, I really can be like that.

Im not really doing much with Chad anymore, he seems to have sorta forgotten about me recently, he says hes busy so I guess he is, Ill be seeing him Thursday to evaluate where my feelings stand.

The other guy Im just being a friend for mostly, Ive liked him on and off for years and never gave it much thought. He doesnt even know I have interest in him, I just hang out with him when he needs someone to hang out with while he goes through the emotions of the confusion hes in.

Ive thought about just dropping all ideas for any of the guys I have interest in just to keep confusion at a minimum. I dislike this type of stuff.

[[D.E.M] zetsumei]

I'd say leave chad to work out the problems with his girlfriend, cheating is never good, no matter how big the distance between a couple is. its still cheating.

the middle schooler seems to still have feelings for the on/off girlfriend, otherwise they wouldnt be together anymore at all.. as for the pushy older guys.. it seems weird to go off into the sunset with someone who pushed you into doing so.

my advice, just wait things out, you dont have to have a boyfriend "LIEKRIGHTNAO"
just be patient for a bit.. thats just my personal advice.

[Umber]

Trust me I know I dont need a boyfriend RIGHT NOW! Thats why Im not really making any decisions. Ive been thinking about dropping all possibilities and not thinkng about anyone in that aspect. The Chad guy is the one thats causing me the most problems though.