Just a long rant about being left out.

[guest22811]

This rant is probably gonna be a long one. Just need to vent a little about recent happenings. Won’t be on TFF for a while either.




After I told my friends that I was a furry, I felt like they have been leaving me out. They have excluded me from almost everything. They said that I was included in their ‘squad’ but it never seemed like they did. Every morning, I wait for them at the train station, but they never wait for me. They never sit with me. In fact, they rarely like to talk to me at all. Once I spent the entire day not talking at all and they didn’t seem to care. Once I had a panic attack at school and they didn’t even notice. I’m always the one dragging behind when they walk ahead in a group if you know what I mean. They always hug each other, but they haven’t touched me in weeks. I feel like a boring book on a bookshelf waiting to be read. Every time I make a joke, no one laughs or even gives me a chuckle. I’m basically ignored.
One of the most heartbreaking things they have done that made me feel so excluded is that they went to a photobooth, took a photo without me and put text that said ‘SQUAD 2K16’. I wasn’t in it. To make it worse, they stuck the photo everywhere. On their laptops, on their books, on their lockers. I felt so rejected and betrayed.
I also feel like they’re only friends with me because of my talents in art and animation. They never appreciate my artwork. My entire ‘squad’ is just a bunch of A+ students and weeaboos.
However, I’m unsure about all this information I just wrote in the paragraph above.
It might be only 2 particular people in my squad that have been affecting me. Yesterday, they both happened to be absent. (My entire squad consists of 6 people including me) On this day, I actually felt included and useful. And today, when they returned, I felt shitty again like all the other days of the week.
I don’t want to leave everyone though, because I literally have no other ‘friends’.


I wish I have never came to my school.

[Raymond Volkogonov]

Screw them. Holding on people who are not respecting you is a bad habit. Calling them friends is not good either. A random good guy from TFF is more friend to you, because he is actually worried about you situation and gives some advice.

I had the same situation in school. But worse.

I was a beat-up toy.

There were some good guys'n'girls, who basically gave me some respect to my skills (My good level of English or general knowledge of some history and science facts), but we were not friends. Most of others just thought it would be nice to have fun of me (I was overweight, which added the amount of disrespect) and make me cry. Well I can tell you that was an ENORMOUS amount of stress I had every day for five years almost non-stop. So of cource I used the internet and furry fandom to run from my problems. This helped me to hold myself under control.

Untill once I outraged and smashed one of my classmate's head into the door's corner. That was rather painful I suppose. From that day I simply became an outsider for two years. God, how I enjoyed it.

So, why am I telling you this?

After the school, I went to university. And you know what? I made a lot of friends there! I met intelligent, respectful, smart people I had many topics to discuss. And since I left it after two years, we still talk and meet from time to time.

You live in 21 century, with internet and other wonderful stuff. Use it to live through the school and then find people, who will respect you. Do not try to hold on someone you thought was your friend. They made their choice. Now instead of trying to follow them, make your choice. With respect to yourself.