148,695
I'll start off with mine then I'll suppose...
Me: "I dunno, I once had a dream where I reciever [REDACTED] from a giant snake, but thats about it."
Random guy that was trying to convince me to be gay: "I can dress up as a snake if you like."
Me: "Oh, thanks, thats, ehhhh..."
EDIT: Yeah, I'll give ye ye colour back!