My mate's parents (mainly his father)...

[Vee Katame: His Wolfy]

So I was informed of the following stuff on Friday (by my mate obviously), but it's still really bugging so I figured I'd make a rant.
Basically, my mate (whose name is Josh) is on the verge of being kicked out of his parents' house (for no good reason). But here's the story...

So Josh's father decided to call a family meeting for no particular reason. And he decided to kick Josh out of his room and make him sleep in the piano room in his sleeping bag with only two days worth of clothes. Josh's room is locked and he's not allowed to go in it until his father tells him he can. His father's reasoning for this is to "prove a point", that point being that if Josh doesn't have his WHOLE life figured out by the time he's 25, he'll be worse off than he is now with what his father is making him go through.
Also, he said that if Josh doesn't have his whole life figured out by the time he's 30 (why the age is different with the two things, I don't know), that his father will write him out of his Will. This is something Josh doesn't care anything about though, so it doesn't really matter or have any effect.
And also, his father decided that neither he or Josh's mother are going to give Josh a ride anywhere. So when Josh wanted to go to a thing at church, he had to walk 14 miles (not sure if that was combined for there & back, or if it was actually 28 miles total...but I think it was the first, hopefully). The only reason he was given a ride to dinner that night was so his dad could keep up the "public image". It's kind of like, "Hello! Wouldn't you think that it would be obvious that he'd tell his girlfriend who'd at least tell her parents about it?!" because I do that with all the stuff they do to him that he tells me about. Why? Because he doesn't care if I do.
And something to remember here is that his mother is just going along with everything his father says, not trying to object or stand up for her son or anything. It's disappointing but doesn't surprise me at all.

It's completely frustrating and Josh is ready to just rent a U-Haul to move here...but that's something he'd have to ask my dad about first. The hard part is that Josh is asking my dad's permission to propose to me while he's here too, so yeah, that could make things sound the wrong way (like he's only going to ask to marry me so he can live in my father's house, but that's not how it is). Plus, him and I are really hoping that he is allowed to go into his room before he comes here on the 20th or else he'll only have two days worth of clothes for a three-week visit, and he won't be able to get my ring or the things he has made for me (which are my Valentine's Day presents that I told him not to send, just to wait until his visit to bring them with him).
I'm sure there is a lot more I want to say but the frustration is kind of fogging up my brain so it's difficult to think of things and word them correctly.
So I guess that concludes my rant. I feel somewhat better, but only somewhat.

[Armalite_]

A few of the people I know are going through the same thing as Josh. Except the people I know are virtually homeless now. They do have jobs but they can only go home to sleep. Other than that, they live in cars or stay with friends. They were kicked out because of the amount of drugs they got into during high school but they were warned several times. I guess it's a choice thing. If they don't care, that's their choice, so there isn't really anything I can do about it other than to try and help them out where I can. Josh seems to still have parents who care about him and who let him stay in the house which is good. I think it's still not too late for him to turn things around. But to me, I think planning your WHOLE life out is a bit difficult if not next to impossible. Plans never go the way you want them. I don't plan my life out further than the next year if not the next day. Even then, my plans get destroyed by something that "comes up."

[Asia Kali Yusufzai]

Frankly i see no reason to worry too much. If Josh does end up living with you and pretty much disconnecting himself from his family then that is his choice and he should do what he wants to do. After that, you two are together and you're both safe and happy. He'll have to get a job and a place of his own eventually, especially when you two are married but other than that, all i see is his parents pushing him away. If they want to push him away then let them push him to you and you two can deal with your lives together without them interfering. So everyone's happy

[Tyla]

Ouch. And here I am thinking I don't even know what I want to do for a long-term job, let alone having a life planned out. Plus having the pressure must be pretty terrible, as it would just make it harder for you to think under those conditions.

Personally, if I was in that position, I'd just draw up a random plan and go with that for the parents, and when I've got my own life sorted, stray from that path.

[Vee Katame: His Wolfy]

That is the way I try to think of it, AB. I've always said that they're pushing him away and the things is, his mother never wants him to leave (him being her only child and all) so she should do something about what's going on if she cared so much. But I have no problem with him living here and he was actually supposed to move here last summer but that plan was ruined by his parents, so my dad will most likely have no problem with it if he decides to move here since he didn't mind the first time.
Oh no, he couldn't come up with some random plan. They'd have to hear (or read) it and approve it. If it wasn't good enough, he'd have to change it. And they'd never approve of it because it would always involve him marrying me...and they don't like me at all.
The problem is, the expect absolute perfection from him. That's way too much pressure for any person. And their encouragement is way more like discouragement.
I just feel so bad for him and how he has to go through all this junk.

[★Kuro★]

Aw Vee, that's really terrible...
hopefully he can just move in with you and if he's over the age of 18, couldn't he just leave now?
I know living under his parent's roof means he has to do what they say, but if the things in his room belong to him, he should go in there, take his things, and leave.
I can see how money would tie into this, though. Do you guys live far apart?
Or maybe you could help him along financially when and if he comes to live with you.

[Asia Kali Yusufzai]

His parents remind me of my mum, though mine are of a far less extreme variety.
Constantly pushing for something more and more and more. As if I'm always just out of reach of approval. My mum will never like what i want to grown into, and she has an active dislike of my girlfriend. The thing is, after all this pushing to make me into somebody, all I want is to be nobody. three steps left of the hero spot is the perfect place for me, purely because of the way I was brought up.

[Vee Katame: His Wolfy]

Yeah. That's the sad part. He's 22 (will be 23 in September) and they still treat him like a kid.
Yes, he could leave now if he wanted but money to move is an issue (that's why I'd help because it's just $65 to rent a U-Haul).
He's planning on looking for a job if he moves here and then getting his own apartment when he has enough money (that was his plan for the first try that didn't end up working out how we wanted). And he was planning on helping pay for stuff while living under my father's roof too.
Of course, my dad has always said that he had no problem with making the upstairs (which is where my room is, a bathroom, and my brother's old room) an apartment just so long as I pay for part of the expenses (groceries or part of the electric bill or whatever).