Need some help with something... stupid

[Takamei Edevane]

Hey all who read this, once again another war has broken loose within my residence between my father and me.

And well, I do believe what I am asking of him is perfectly reasonable and you won't believe how silly it is. Here's the story. For the past week or so we have been fitting in a new bathroom, and father has fitted in a valve of some sorts which keeps the temperature constant. So this means it can only be adjusted from behind this massive shower cubicle. Which means once it is fitted, it cannot be changed.

The problem is, father likes his shower temperature very hot. Which is way too hot for me to bear, as I am more sensitive than him which he always seems to forget. So I talked to him this morning to ask for to be changed, and he said no. I reasoned with him, with perfectly acceptable things. He said "the temperature is perfect, it doesn't need to be changed" and I said, it may be the perfect temperature for you but not for me. I even mentioned "I think this saying fits well here, a team is only as fast as its slowest member" and he didn't respond. And I asked him why he was being so selfish, and then to not say a word about it after that. He threatened to take away the WiFi and the power to my room, like I was some sort of kid to him. I still cannot believe he doesn't treat me like an adult, he was being more childish than me.


Is there anyway I can get him to be reasonable? Even though he is a very unreasonable, selfish, childish, and disrespectful man.

[MrRazot]

what would it take to change it yourself?
even a tiny bit every day until his "perfect temperature" is actually yours

[Midnight Madness]

Sadly, I doubt it. Even my grandfather would be willing to turn it down, if we had something like that. My grandfather is stubborn and tends to be inconsiderate, cantankerous even. If someone doesn't listen to sound reason, they either don't understand or just don't care. You can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink.

Just keep asking in reasonable succession and remain calm, that way if he freaks out, it's completely on him to bystanders. You might even gain supporters if you just keep up on asking the way you are. Just remember not to push it if he's threatening to take things away, so just remember when to back off. You might also try talking to other reasonable members of your household and state your case; backup can often make quite a difference.

[anoni]

The best way to try and get people to be reasonable, is to realize to them, they think they already are reasonable. In order to truly appeal to your father, you need to understand the situation from his point of view. Now from his point of view, he (probably) payed a relatively decent amount of money to have the bathroom fitted and went through work organizing it and so forth (this is an assumption). He then has it at a temperature which he finds satisfactory, so he doesn't want to change it, if he changed it to a temperature that is satisfactory to you, but too cold for him, he'd feel like he is giving something that (to him) he deserves to someone who (this is in his point of view) did nothing to deserve it.

  Which is a valid point of view, but your point of view is also certainly valid, you can't have a shower if it's far too hot for you to stand so it isn't very fair. Probably the best solution to this problem is a compromise between you and your father, my first question is why do you have a crank that fixes the shower temperature? To me that seems like a terrible idea, I find myself constantly adjusting shower temperatures because sometimes I am in the mood for a warm shower, or sometimes I'm in the mood for a cool shower, depending if I'm overheated or freezing. So my first suggestion would be to try and convince him to remove the crank or add a feature so you can change the temperature dynamically, cause I really don't see much of a use for it personally.

 If for whatever reason that does not suit, then you can change it yourself (or get your dad to show you how to change it). When you figured it out, you can change the temperature before you have a shower and (possibly if you wanted (if you offered to do this it would help convince your father)) change it back to the original temperature after you had the shower. In which case you both can have satisfactory showers.

[Takamei Edevane]

I'll try my best :\

The constant temperature control is there because without it the temperature fluctuates. Without it we would have ot and cold showers. And once the shower is placed it will be permanent. Things are never easy...