Fall Apart

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

This is what happens when I let my feelings run out on the page unrestricted

Fall apart

Ever feel like everything is falling apart?
That you can't control it?
It's ******-up and you know it, but still you sit and do nothing
Despite the fact that apathy solved nothing
Friends leave you, lovers hate you, you scream that nobody understands, how can they when you
Can't even understand yourself?
You know you should do something

But you waited too long
Your friends reject you
Your family hates you
Your all alone in this
You scream until you lose your voice, you don't understand how this can happen, and impossibly
You know it's your fault, you bear the blame

You get angry at this ******* world, how dare they do this to you, after all you've done
They say you betrayed them
You say you ******* made them
You picked them up when they fell down
You dried their tears, and you stuck by them
And this is how they repay you?

**** happens and you know there's nothing you can do
So why do you feel the need to?
Your a closed book, people don't know you
You trusted someone, confided in them and they shouted it out to everyone
That's why you don't trust, don't confide
That's why you hide, away from the people who would beat you
Defeat you, just so they can repeat it the next ******* day

You have a dark past, but you act as though you were normal, you wish you were normal
You wish you didn't have these problems
But you know that wishes, they don't come true
you found this out when you were in your bedroom
Crying, trying to get away from the man who would beat you
Defeat you, just so he can repeat it the next ******* day

But all that's over now, your older now
it still haunts you, but you have new problems
You push it to the back of your mind
and people wonder why your so ****** up? They say that their life is bad?
You just nod and offer them a silent shoulder

You, the unsung hero of your own life, content to be in the background, when your mind screams to
be in the spotlight

This is my story, my life....and it's falling apart

[Shenzii]

sometimes i feel like that.

and you worded it magnificently.

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

Thank you, I really appreciate the compliment.
It means alot to me, and I'm glad that you found some enjoyment in reading my work

[Golge]

this.....is.......awesome...

you sir have talent 'salutes'

[Shenzii]

=] no problem.

I'm in a rough patch in my life and i read this. i feel a little better. because while reading it i felt like i was expressing myself at the moment. I want to thank you for posting it.

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

Wow, I'm really glad I helped, I guess it is comforting to know somebody, somewhere is feeling the same as you, It doesn't make you feel so alone in your problems.

I was debating whether to post it or not, but I'm glad I did now.

and Golge; Thank you for the compliment, it warms my heart to know people enjoy my work

[Shenzii]

I'm glad you did too. Yea it definitely reassured my emotions, to know that i wasnt the only one out there.

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

Yeah, It makes me feel a bit better knowing I wasn't the only one feeling this way, and it is heartening when someone understands what your going through, even if you don't really know them.

and here's some advice: when you feel annoyed or just depressed, write...write your feelings down onto paper and look back upon it...it makes you feel alot better, I know this from experience.

and just so you know, I'm not trying to be condescending or patronising, just trying to help

[Shenzii]

I know you're not. And thanks for the advice. I normally just stay up all hours of the night crying. That isn't cutting it for me anymore... so i need an alternative and this is the best one that has been suggested to me yet! Thank you!

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

your welcome, I'm truly glad I could help you further, and If you have any questions, feel free to ask in PM or anything and I will try my hardest to answer

[Shenzii]

thanks! your a really great person

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

Thank you, I just feel that everybody should look out for one-another and help where we can, and if that makes me a good person, then that's a bonus

[Chrono Blackwyng]

You use paper, I use rp...but it gets the same results...so I'm happy  
Btw...nice poem/story/song Snowy...that sounds alot like what I go through everyday...but I find ways of getting around it =3

[.: ♥ Kiniia ♥ :.]

Good for you, everyone has different ways of coping with things, and I'm happy you can cope with it, it takes a strong person to deal with something like this everyday.

[kayle]

I remove my floppy sombrero and salute you, Snowy!  It's a very good poem!  It really conveys a lot of emotion, and I can relate to it very well!  I'd still be there if not for my friends, both the ones I know and the ones I don't!  Keep it up!

 P.S. -  (I have no clue where the floppy sombrero came from, but I think I'll add that to my description...)