The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Ori on July 18, 2017, 02:43:28 AM
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This situation is kinda... strange.
So I told my mother I got a girlfriend. At first she didn't care, (She didn't even look up from her phone when I said it.) Ten minutes later she asked a few questions the last one being, what's her ethnicity. And I said Chinese and Spanish. And literally translated this is what she said, "Oh, I thought you were going to have a sweet 'Japanese' girlfriend." And of course that ticked me off. What the heck is that supposed to mean, are you saying my girlfriend isn't sweet and saying that Japanese woman are somehow automatically better than Hispanic/ Chinese girlfriends? Anyhow putting that aside, two weeks later. My mother says, there's this really sweet Japanese girlfriend about your age in the next town over and that I should go see her. And my reaction is no. And then she insists again next week. I said no.
Then about a week later she comes visit my store on the same day I work, 'coincidentally.' Sure I work four days a week in eight hour shifts. But really? On the least busy day at night? Hmm... Seems fishy. And she asks me for my number and I thought sure have my phone number. And I would of said no if it didn't seem rude. Imagine my mother is putting me up to be this good guy, and then that good guy immediately says no you can't have my phone number. And one of her friends were with her too. I just couldn't say no, it felt kinda wrong. And so now she's asking me out to a movie Friday. I said sure. I honestly don't like her anyhow. If there was a polite way to say no, I would of said it. I just hope this goes nowhere. And I'm guessing just us...
If anyone has any recommendations on what to do, I would take it. (And for all goodness sakes, I love my girlfriend, I only need her in my life. And no one else. The faster I boot her out of my life the better.)
(I mean my mother said she did have a BF, but honestly. She lies a lot so her word means crap.)
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Parents getting you partners is probably the worst thing to deal with when you live at home. I'm guessing you're also Japanese for your mum to want you to be with one ?
Imo if you haven't done so already then let your girlfriend know what's going on so she doesn't assume you're cheating or anything. Then probably just assume that you and this new girl will be friends ? Eg of she asks you to a movie or something say 'oh my girlfriend really liked that one' or even ask to bring her along maybe. Just kinda be clear that you've got a gf and aren't interested in anything beyond friendship ?
Hope that helps some at least
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That sounds like a good idea Thanks!
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Lots of parents say and do lots of stupid things. Granted, some of them are for your own good. This is an example of something that's not. Do what you feel is right. Communicate with anyone and everyone involved, be it your mother, girlfriend, or the other girl, and make sure they know where you stand. If you love the girl, then she's worth the fight.
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Lots of parents say and do lots of stupid things. Granted, some of them are for your own good. This is an example of something that's not. Do what you feel is right. Communicate with anyone and everyone involved, be it your mother, girlfriend, or the other girl, and make sure they know where you stand. If you love the girl, then she's worth the fight.
That's also a good idea. I'll tell the other girl that I already have someone .
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I briefly read what others wrote, but to give my own advice:
I would ask her what this girl is internested in, why she wants to meet up with you and stuff.
She might say something like: Well, because you seem like a fun guy. (Or whatever, doesn't matter.)
Then indeed bring up something like: "I already have someone, so I'm not interested in a relationship. Just so you know."
That way, you're blunt but not unkind. You're simply stating what's going on.
And then maybe this girl will also stop meeting up with you, or at least less often, if indeed your mum set her up with you.
If this girl does make advances, stop contact altogether. Like you said, you don't want or need her in your life, so you shouldn't feel obligated either way to meet up or even stay in touch with her.
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I've got to completely agree with Ventus Fall. Tell her bluntly.