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Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Dragonbragoshago on February 09, 2015, 01:59:33 AM

Title: I kinda need advice...
Post by: Dragonbragoshago on February 09, 2015, 01:59:33 AM
Hello fellow furs, I have been grappling with depression and agoraphobia since I was little. it was "manageable" but it makes it hard to function because they feed into each other. It makes it very hard to wake up in the morning Normal and makes my loneliness unbearable. Today, I had to go to target due to the storm I tried to go as soon as they opened to avoid the crowds. I  when got there the store was packed. I made it through the store fine up until I had to get in line long story short I ended up having a panic attack and crying with people laughing at me. So now I barely want to be alive anymore . I wouldn't normally post this sorta thing but I feel as though I can trust you guys and I think I'm at the end of the line.

Sorry if it a little tough to read
Title: Re: I kinda need advice...
Post by: Angder on February 09, 2015, 02:23:15 AM
I have depression, and dislike crowds, though clearly not as badly as you do, so I understand what your going through

If I was able I would PM you right now to talk to you, but unfortunately its 2:15 AM here, and I need to sleep. but Know that I am willing to talk. and have some understanding as to what you are experiencing.

You are not alone.

*hugs Raven*

PM me, and I will reply at 4PM tommorow (I live in england, so that's Early morning I belive in America)

I am happy to talk.
 
 
Edit: Ok, everything I said in this post is true, but remind me not to post at 2:00 AM! I cant post well while tired  @.@
Title: Re: I kinda need advice...
Post by: anoni on February 09, 2015, 05:30:10 AM
I had similar responses when I was younger to varying stimuli, not necessarily crowds though.

  The thing I learned was to know your boundaries well, to know exactly what you can manage and can't manage and to actively avoid situations that you can't manage and to have a plan set in place if you are in a situation you can't manage. For example, trying to get to target before the crowds got there was good, so you did good in that regard because you thought before hand that there would be crowds there so you actively attempted to avoid the stimuli you already knew would be bad for you, so for that good job! But, things you haven't counted on do happen, so you may need to find a plan when you do find yourself in a situation that's not very good.

  For crowded areas, I find the general idea is that there's so much going on, so much over stimulation that you can't really handle it, you can't feel safe in that situation because it's simply impossible to keep track of everything. A remedy for this that may help is to just focus on one thing when in a crowded situation, just one thing. For example, if you are in a line, just focus on  the person in front of you. Look at his back, what shirt is he wearing? What material is it made of? What kind of pattern does it have? What is he doing? Is he on his phone? Is he talking? Listen in to his conversation, see what he's talking about (but don't talk to him or anything, just quietly listen). Only focus on HIM and him alone, no one else, just try to intently focus on him. Obviously don't just stare at his face cause that might make him uncomfortable, but just be a quiet observer, attempting to get as much information about this person as you can until he goes away and its your turn to do the line. Focusing on one thing will help drown out everything else and may stop the overstimulation.
Title: Re: I kinda need advice...
Post by: George on February 09, 2015, 09:37:14 PM
I have no experience with this sort of thing, but on anoni's point, do you have any mobile games? (Like a DS or something) Focusing on that might help, but as I said, I haven't really experienced this so I'm just saying what MIGHT help.
Title: Re: I kinda need advice...
Post by: Dragonbragoshago on February 09, 2015, 10:21:20 PM
Thank you guys very much for you're advice. I did use to have tiny stuffed animal on my keying I would squeeze to calm me down but they got ruined from my job. I will try what you suggested anoni.
Title: Re: I kinda need advice...
Post by: Twilight Rose on February 12, 2015, 06:16:59 AM
I know this feeling all too well. The main lobby of my college is kinda centric to moving around, and it randomly gets so packed that I have a panic attack. Just the other day I had to ditch a friend and go outside, crouch with my head between my knees and my hands over my head and just breath, because one started. For me, the air feels thin, like there's no oxygen, and I can't breathe. I rarely get to the crying point anymore, but I can't move once one kicks in... I generally have to force my breath under control or deal with it.