The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Νeρτune on August 21, 2011, 07:24:00 PM
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Hi i recently had a big situation involving my boyfriend`s and i`s parents. long story short
, our relationship was a secret because of his parents views on homosexuality as well as my own mothers mocking. his mom went through his phone and found messages that not only showed that we were together but also how far our relationship ``had gone`` (if that makes sense, i`m saying that we`ve been ``together``) his parents are furious,my mom has called me a poser and fag, i only get to talk to him like once a week for a few minutes on the phone HE told me that his parents said that i could NEVER see him again at this point i don`t really kniw what to do with myself, i haven`t slept in a few days,i cry often and i just can`t even think. he also told me that he is being put in a ``de-gay``` program run by ``gays who changed thanks to the power of christ``. I just need advice,he means everything to me and this is killing us both,people have totold me to break up,but i cant do it, i love him too much,we`d even discussed getting an apartment together after high school. Figuring out my sexuality has been hard enough without this. I need advice, help,anything, i don`t know where to turn, so im reaching a paw out to anyone who will take it.
thanky for reading this,really, it means alot
sincerely, Neptune
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wow . . . you're in a very precarious situation, and unfortunately there is little you can do about it. The thing is, at our age love and relationships are a tricky subject to get right. I think it is a rare thing for two people to actually be truly in love at our age. If you Know what you have is real, then I say wait. Wait till you can leave the clutches of your dreadful parents, and wait till you two can start making decisions without your parents interfering, and if when that day comes, you still feel for eachother what you felt before, then it was worth.
My experience has proven to me that once something has been deprived of you, if you really want it, you will wait for it, and when you finally get it, you appreciate it thousands of times more then before.
I'm sorry there isn't an immediate fix all plan here, or at least one I can see, and the sad thing is parents have control over you for a long time and when you want to be free of them, you have to be completely free of them. I really hope this helps you. I know that if my parents stepped into my relationship with my girlfriend, I would be devastated as well, but I would do exactly what I told you.
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Hi Neptune. For starters, My heart really breaks for you. That is such a horrible, horrible, horrible thing to have to go through. I had to go through a similar situation with my last boyfriend. The only thing you can do is to power through it. Talk to him EVERY chance you get. And when you do cherish that time. Maybe you and him could stage a break up. And let things cool down. I'm not even sure if that would work.
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I hope you and your boyfriend can make it through this okay. Please send me a private message and let me know how things are going. And always feel free to talk to me if you want. I can't imagine going though any of that again.
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yeah, stage a break up, find a time to get back with each other
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hey, iam so sorry to hear that ( on in this case read)
Try a fake break up, make it seem like you don't like him, tell him about it and get him to play along. If all goes well you should be able to make it seem real and still try to see him secretly, delete your texts regularly to avoid this.
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That's just wrong, I feel like you should tell them that to their face. Horrible. Ugh. But to be low key I agree, stage a break up but do everything you can to keep talking.
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Thats awful! "Power of christ too degay". This is why I am an athiest
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Oh Christ... These "straight camps" as they call them are abusive and negligent environments that only further degrade the self esteem of the poor fellows they try to change. I am disgusted by places like them. It's wrong to try and change someone's sexuality just because you think it's not right. Even religious text states one should love their fellows, no matter the flaws!
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"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."(NIV, John 13:34-35)
Who is my Neighbor?
We commonly think of neighbors as the people who live near us, but Jesus meant it to include all mankind - even our enemies! Jesus told His famous parable of the Good Samaritan to make it clear that "love your neighbor" means to love all persons, everywhere - not just our friends, allies, countrymen, etc.
*found here*http://www.twopaths.com/jneighbr.htm
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This manner of assimilation is extremely hypocritical and ignorant of others feelings, if you ask me.
But the one thing I find hard to give in situations like these is advice... I will have to say that you have the right to verbally defend yourself when they call you a derogatory term. Mental abuse is illegal too. Tell them EXACTLY how you feel and don't hold back any emotions, if they don't accept it, fine. But you'll know that you've had your honest say. Then after that, all I can advise is the same as the others; stage a break up. People should really just grow up and understand humanity is diverse; no one tag can ever be placed on it.
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He Is Going To Have A Fake GirlFriend For A While In An Effort To Shake His Parents So They Just Hate Me, And Leave Him Alone. And His Parents Actually Said That He Wouldn't Be In Trouble Any More If He Had A GirlFriend, Yeah, They Are Just Awful. Even Though We Have That In Place, We Are Still Sinking, (We Constantly Compare Our Relationship To A Boat), Without Any Contact, He Is Slipping Away. He Said He Hopes That Our Ship Can Still Sail, But It Has Become Apparent That If It All Goes Titanic( ^_^ :/ :'( Awwww...) It Will Not Weigh On Him As Heavily As It Will On Me, He Is Just, The Most Amazing Person I Have Ever Met, And I Was (We WERE) Planning On Spending A Long Time Together But I Feel That Slipping Away :(
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Its a shame, try to meet in a puplic area like a mall or something. Tell your parents that your going to see some friends and he can do the same thing or in his tell him thats hes going to see his fake girl friend, ( not sure how she feels about it) and you can still see each other that way but in seacet.