The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: NekoOtome on August 05, 2009, 06:17:10 AM
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I've tried so hard!!!! Rawr! >:(
My dad is completely convinced that the furry fandom is nothing but a fetish! I've tried to tell him that most of us are nice people who aren't even remotely interested in that kind of stuff, and he shows me a Google search on furries (which needless to say brought up loads of things that gives the rest of the fandom a bad bad name...). Hes reluctant to let me go to my first ever furry convention cause hes convinced that I'm gonna be harassed or something :/. Anywhoo... what would you do in my situation, how would you proove to him that furries are not what the media cracks us up to be?
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I guess it really all depends on how open your parents are and how old you are. I never said anything to my parents till now really (I'm 26 now.) Though I still don't think they really get it. They are just happy I'm doing something with my art. My parents don't pay to much attention to the furry fandom, and I'm glad of that. But sadly to tell you the truth, most of the fandom is a giant fetish. Though the good people who are into the fetish do keep it under raps. But it's like any group, a few will ruin it for the whole.
As for not letting you go to your first furry con, I see where he's coming from. He's being a good dad, that's all. Sometimes to make it easier on parents it helps if you go with close friends, or one of your parents go with you. Yea they would be embarrassing, but it makes them feel better to make sure your safe. My first convention was an Anime one, I went alone and didn't spend the night. Your age also plays a major part, if your a under 18 you really have no choice in your life really. Besides anything can happen at a furry con. Experience is on my side. (Heck even at a fur meet, Oh god there was only a curtain between rooms!!)
Sadly there isn't much you can do to prove to him once his mind is set. It's an unknown thing, and humans by nature are a fearful race.
I pretty much waited till I was old enough, had my own money and my own car. Parents can't really stop me then. But that's just me.
Maybe to help your situation you could try to make your dad more comfortable with the idea of you going off to a place full of potential perverts. Do your research, find out what ever you can about this convention (which one is it BTW?) And find people who have con to this con, ask them questions, how safe is it? If need be where is the closest emergency place? Also see if you can convince a close friend to go with you, more friends you have the more comfortable parents are. You're always safer in groups. If all else fails see if one of your parents or relatives is willing to go with you. Nothing says safe like family.
This article might help, I was there that year, the skunk they are talking about is a friend of mine. It was my first furry con, yes we had an incident. One of my friends ended up in a situation he shouldn't have. I regret not being able to help him out, when he needed it. So yea stuff can go down, but if you stick with familar friends you are normally okay.
http://www.hartfordadvocate.com/article.cfm?aid=3873 (http://www.hartfordadvocate.com/article.cfm?aid=3873)
I hope I help you out a little. Just keep in mind, you may have to wait a few years, and you're dad may never come around.
*Snugs* Hope it turns out for the best. ;)
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Hey thanks that really helped. As for the con I was planning to bring close friends (more like a small pack if I do say so myself). The con seems pretty safe, there is security and I'm sure they'll keep a specific eye on minors. I'll take your advice though and see where it gets me ^_^.
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What con if you don't mind me asking?
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Rocky Mountain Fur con
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I haven't told ANYONE I've seen in real life I'm one, including my friends and family. Everyone I know just kinda proves off they aren't, and It would be way too strange to tell them off with how it is. They've known me for too long a certain way. Also, my mom freaks out enough if she thinks I'm gay (which I'm not) and I have NOTHING against gays at all. One of my best friends is gay. But it just kinda makes me cringe to think my mom would freak out about me being gay... I don't want to imagine telling her about furry.
No actual "Fur" cons per se come by here, but alot of Anime Conventions do. I've never been to one, but one of my friends invited me to one in February, and I said I didn't know who to go as (cause I guess you HAVE to go as a character from Anime, haha) So he said to think about it. Which I did. I'm currently working on my fursuit, which is a perfect rendition of Scautty, so I just told him I was going as that, and luckily he was cool with it and it didn't spark any questionable topics.
As for others to talk to about this, the only sources I have is this forum and some friends on YouTube. I was giddy to find this one guy who lived a few miles from Kansas City, noting he posted a video of him in suit at Legends 14 (Just 30 minutes away from me,) but I don't know how old he is. I have alot of friends that are 30 years old (I hang with a mature crowd), but it would just seem strange to meet an older furry. I don't want him to be furvert or anything.
But this is noting we can even meet. I have unknown expectations, he hasn't talked to me on YouTube yet, but I still feel kinda down I can't reflect how I am to my friends. They don't seem accepting of something like this. But in whatever ends this meantime, I have this site and YouTube to cope with. And maybe meet some at that convention I go to, noting I make the suit the best I can. :)
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My main problem is with my dad, all the others are curious, but not necessarily sniggering every time I mention the word furry. One of my friends is even trying to become furry. Besides that I only really have the forum to truly talk about being furry as well.
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It's good to know someone's there for you. :) At some times I'll wonder if my friends would ever consider being furry... but I always have to take into consideration I still have to break to them I am.
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Why dont you try taking it slow with them. I sorta introduced my friends to furries by concepts they can relate to, and thankfully theres a bunch of things within the furry kingdom. For instance, one of my friends loves anime and drawings. I showed her some anthro art, namely some doodles I've done myself *points at avatar*. Eventually I wound up showing her my ear tail paws set, and she was ecstatic that the art can go as far as suits like that. Shes the one that is now trying to become a furry herself ^_^.
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That's one of my intentions. But most of my friends I highly doubt are close to furry, and I also don't want to force it upon them. However, one of them seems interested. The one I was talking about earlier that goes to the cons and stuff, I had recently told him about my project in making the fursuit. (Of course, to make it interpretable, I said "costume.") So now he's really ecstatic about that actually, and he's even drawn out some ideas for one he plans to make as well. I'm not sure if that's just him being creative or if he's into being furry. I wish it were alot easier, like I could just ask him and if I somehow embarass myself I can just rewind and know from then on. :/
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Well you can tell your friend that there are other things like Scaulty. I wouldn't go about showing him/her the forum and all of your furfriends and all that jazz, don't like dump it all at once y'know? Maybe show the friend some pics of Scaulty if you haven't already. If he/she shows interest, then keep going deeper and deeper. You dont have to convert the person, and usually fans of anime are pretty open to furries anyway.
Post Merge: August 06, 2009, 03:44:30 AM
Another one of my friends knows I'm a furry, and shes pretty indifferent. I'd say the only really negative views on furries are people who have seen *ahem* adult art, and thus associate furries with that. Besides that almost everyone is indifferent, if not interested X3.
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Yeah, I find it easier to explain how YOU'RE a furry, and not how normal furries are. It can veer any thought towards the adult-situated away. But yes, I will most definitely try that. In due time I bet he will understand. Thanks for the talk! :)
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No problem! Glad I can help ^___^. Good luck with your friends, I don't think you'll have any problems at all.
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well it's a toughie actually most parents just turn a blind eye to any kind of logic other then "omg my bbf said furry = pr0n" then it's instantly wired in their head that its a fetish action...
so really the best way is to sneak out >;D o.O :S
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exactly what your saying... most of us are completly normal people... i lead a normal life, except for maybe the odd miaow, outside of here or with other furs.... i peronally have nothing to do with yiff and i hate the way people... not just furries >:( .... are grouped together and stereotyped because of one or two people who DO NOT typicalise all of us... :(
my parents said that anything was fine so long as it was not illegal... im really glad they said that, they seem to realise my life is my own, and theres no point in them trying to change that ^_^
but for you it really does seem your stuck.... though its no different from going to any other convention, seriously, just cos its furries doesnt mean your any more likely to get bloomin sexually assaulted >:(
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I'd say I look and act NOTHING like the normal furry, with a definite undertone involving nothing around yiff or anything. I really am one merely for the equality and understanding basically everyone attributes to in the fandom. I also love hugs. :P
I'm slowly breaking it into my friend I'm one, but indirectly. He'll take it I'm a yiffer if I do, so I'm just filling him in on my fursuit construction progress. Actually, he plans to make one too which is pretty cool. We're going to associate in fundraisers and charity event with them... Starting with the Crop Walk in October. (Although deadlines DO get me nervous, I want to at least get a partial done for it.)
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I could probably tell my parents...since they have no idea what furries are (I don't want them researching the false scam of what people say the fandom is >:( ) My parents said I could do anything I wanted as long as I didn't get a girl pregnant or drop out of school XD anything else, they look the other way. Would I buy a fursuit? Sure...but it's that or a Chevrolet Avalanche so...
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Haha, a car or a fursuit? Of course I would choose car, even though the price isn't even comparable. If it were anything else I'd buy a laptop, haha.
But yeah, I know exactly what you mean. The only thing that bugs me is they're so uptight about me being gay (Which I'm not, I'm not sure what sparked such an idea,) that I don't know if they'll even be comfortable with something they've never heard of.
And I DO NOT want the internet to tell them, like you said. They'll just think "Costumes. Sex. No." XD