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Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: HollowOfHaze on December 02, 2015, 03:11:57 AM

Title: I am too outgoing.
Post by: HollowOfHaze on December 02, 2015, 03:11:57 AM
When I joined this site, I naturally considered that I would be interacting with at least a few people here. I was right. The problem is, I was too right. I find myself often saying "Hello" and "How are you?" to several people each day, and I get the feeling that instead of giving the impression of being a warm, sociable person, I'm just giving people the idea that I am clingy or quick to get my nose in other people's business. There's a good chance that if you are reading this, I have probably attempted to contact you in some way or another. I am not normally like this in public, and I do not want my reputation as a reasonable, respectable person to be warped by a tendency to give a greeting to every single person who I find somewhat interesting. I am legitimately trying to be friendly with people, and my concern for people in difficult times is legitimate as well, but I don't want to be imposing.


Am I too quick to contact people on this site? Am I doing everything wrong?
Title: Re: I am too outgoing.
Post by: Goblin Cat 😸 on December 02, 2015, 08:17:29 PM
I think you're fine. I think that sometimes people may not respond right off the bat because of their own social tendencies, but I don't think saying hello and whatnot is terrible or wrong.
Title: Re: I am too outgoing.
Post by: Taliaka Anichezachi on December 02, 2015, 09:58:59 PM
hey you seem nice :) not getting into anyone's business, saying how are you is just a friendly act of friendship or interest :) i am just like you :) plenty of friends here, most people know me, and i do tend to be quick :) but i like hanging out with people and i think that doing so is no act of being too social, no you can never get too social :) i have been on TFF for a year now and i have posted pretty much every day and i shall not lie :) when you first got here it was visible, you made tons of new threads and talked to many people including me at one point i think :) but there is no problem in that :) You seem nice and that is what counts :) keep that thought and continue what you are doing :) "Don't worry be furry" ;)
Title: Re: I am too outgoing.
Post by: Silentium Potens on December 02, 2015, 11:14:02 PM
If you're contacting literally everyone, I would say sit back and wait.  In your shoes, I would only be friendly to those who actually stuck around.  Well, by be friendly I mean do the stuff you're doing.

However, the problem isn't that big of a deal to begin with.  Anyone who stays long enough will know that you're quite the reasonable person.  Seriously, your posting style exudes your practical side ad infinitum.
Title: Re: I am too outgoing.
Post by: George on December 03, 2015, 01:32:30 AM
If people want you to stop bugging them, they'll say it. Pretty sure you're fine.
Title: Re: I am too outgoing.
Post by: Halei-Helai on December 03, 2015, 08:01:43 PM
If you cast a wide net, don't be too surprised if you catch some bad fish. I wouldn't necessarily be that surprised if not everybody gets back to you or otherwise seems engaged in whatever conversation you are having with them. Either A: they have their own stuff on their end to worry about, or B: they're just not that into you. In the case of the latter, I think it is a bit unrealistic to expect that everybody will like you, and shooting for that goal is not really advisable. There are people offline who I can't stand to be around, who I am bored by, who I sort of like, and who I think are really great. Online it really wouldn't be all that different.


You just need to stick with the ones who seem genuinely interested in you as a person rather than fretting away time worrying about the ones who seem distant.


For the record I remember you contacting me shortly after I joined this forum, and you seemed okay to me at least.