The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Dax Declan on May 06, 2015, 04:16:35 AM
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Lately I've been thinking and I've realized something. Peoples words themselves don't hurt me, its just that I'll see a group of people hanging out and having a good time, and I'll think "huh, friends. I want that. " then I start to feel kinda lonely. But then when someone says something like "loser" to me, I start to remember how much I envy people who have friends. And thats what hurts. Their words remind me how about that sad thought. But at the same time I feel like that's the same thing as their words hurting me.
Now all the run-on sentences aside, what is you guys opinion on all this?
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Lately I've been thinking and I've realized something. Peoples words themselves don't hurt me, its just that I'll see a group of people hanging out and having a good time, and I'll think "huh, friends. I want that. " then I start to feel kinda lonely. But then when someone says something like "loser" to me, I start to remember how much I envy people who have friends. And thats what hurts. Their words remind me how about that sad thought. But at the same time I feel like that's the same thing as their words hurting me.
Now all the run-on sentences aside, what is you guys opinion on all this?
I know exactly how you feel. I was in the same spot for nearly 4 or 5 years, until graduating to highschool. The problem was that the same people just kept recycling the same rumors and general crap about me over and over, until the unfounded hate had gotten to everyone and people all thought the same of me. The only way to break the cycle is either to be outgoing, or to find a way to reset everyone's perception of you, both of which are notoriously difficult for many people.
Talk to someone, perhaps the people you haven't interacted with before. You never know who you might meet, and what might come from it.
Eventually, word spreads from that one person to their friends about who you really are as a person, and then to their friends' friends, and so on.
It won't always work the first time, or the second. Evenutally, however, it will work.
Soon enough, you won't be as lonely. You just need to look for the proper opportunity to take the first step.
Best of luck.
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Nothing you see is what it seems. Bad people don't make good friends and their group of friends suck anyway.
It only takes one person who shares a similar interests or takes interest in something you also enjoy to show you that anything is possible. Talk to people, do something nice for someone in need, treat people like you would like to be treated. Eventually, your character will make an impression on others. Surround yourself with people who want to better themselves and want to include you in doing the same.
If you see something you want out of life, go get it. It wont be handed to you or come out of the blue. You can't live life wanting something and complaining about not having it if you don't try and try until it's yours. If it's friends, go out and find them. Be proactive about engaging in clubs, sports, community projects, or anything that gets people together to work toward a collective goal or experience. If it fails, try again, and again and again.
Go to the gym, work out, eat healthy, study, and go out to find like-minded individuals like yourself. If you always work on bettering yourself, people will start to engage you on how they can too. It's easy social science.
Elliot Hulse can elaborate.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZUcbFsdxSI (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZUcbFsdxSI)
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Nothing you see is what it seems. Bad people don't make good friends and their group of friends suck anyway.
As someone who makes freinds easily, I can confirm this. The small, tightnit group of so called 'Weirdos' are better friends than all the 'normal' people I am friends with combined.
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I'm kinda "in" with 2 groups of people but I don't feel like either of them consider me to much of a friend.
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I don't really have anyone like that besides my mate. I'm usually to scared to try and make friends.
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Spend more time on the forums. Seriously awesome people around, worth talking to and the such. Also, the only thing truly preventing you from making friends is yourself. Your fears and contribute, but if you truly want to make friends, you have to take that risk. That being said, on the furry forums, I hardly ever find myself in a genuine pickle with another person that doesn't get sorted out either immediately or in a few short hours.
If you want a friend, I'll glad fill the spot though. It's pretty much all I'm good for. If I wasn't a good friend, I would be pretty much worthless. Add me on skype, but just note, I live in Perth, Australia, so our time differences might be fairly different. I've also got school which can take up a lot of my day, so I'm not always around. But I'll try to be as much as I can.