The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Nobi on April 22, 2014, 01:49:09 AM
-
So, I got my first tattoo today. The artist, a friend of mine from high school, took a picture of it in the studio and posted it to his own Facebook page and tagged me in it. It’s gotten about 12-ish likes from my friends so far. But one guy, who I apparently have a couple of mutual friends with (including the artist), felt the need to give his opinion on the tattoo, as well as on me as a person, even though he’s never met me. His comment has since been deleted (either by him, or by the artist, I’m not sure), so I can’t copy and paste it here for an exact quote. But this is my best recollection of what he said:
“…. A huh. A furfag has my tattoo. Well at least women will see mine instead of cartoon animals on a monitor.”
I’m well aware of our fandom’s (mostly false and exaggerated) reputation on the internet, as well as the bullying many of us have endured over the years. It’s just that I’ve never really been on the receiving end of any of it, excluding one incident in which a (now former) friend of mine found it disturbing for various reasons I won’t get into right now. But other than that, I’ve never really been bullied for being a furry. In fact, it's been a good several years since I was legitimately bullied by anyone. So, even though it was just a passing comment, it honestly hurt my feelings. And it’s not just that I was called a furfag—that I can handle. It’s the assumption that, just because I’m part of this fandom, I’m some kind of shut-in who has no friends and has never had, and never will have a relationship. It’s this BS societal standard that measures my masculinity and my worth as a person by how many women I’ve f***ed. I can’t stand it.
It just pisses me off to no end that so many people feel the need to bring others down, and say sh*t to other people without taking that other person’s feelings or sense of self-worth into account. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever said a word to this guy. I’ve seen him comment on mutual friends’ stuff on Facebook, but that’s it. If I HAVE ever spoken to him, all I can think of is that it’s been about which metal bands we like, or something like that. I’ve done nothing bad to him. But apparently my being a furry is enough to make him want to just randomly talk sh*t about me like that.
And with regard to the whole “a furfag has MY tattoo” thing: this tattoo is of my own design. I drew it, and Maine, my girlfriend (yes, a**hole on Facebook, I do have one), put together a digital version identical to my drawing. Yes, I was inspired by other tattoos and designs I’ve seen on the internet, including one done by the same artist who did mine. It’s almost impossible to come up with a completely original design that nobody has ever done before. All art, to some degree, is imitative. I know I’m not the first person to get a tattoo comprised of a hexagonal grid, but neither is that guy who commented. It’s not HIS tattoo. But for whatever reason, he feels the need to claim it as his own and accuse me of some kind of plagiarism. Is it because, as a male, he’s trying to assert his dominance or claim it as some kind of metaphorical “territory,” through which he’ll f**k more females than me? That’s all I can really think of—looking at it from an evolutionary perspective. Humans are animals, after all. But that doesn’t make it acceptable or any less hurtful.
It just pisses me off that people can be so insensitive. I wish more people would just be supportive and kind, or at least make SOME effort to understand that which they don’t.
-
Baby, raise your head high. When people talk crap it's they feel you are better than them. I'm serious... Think about it. Haters will do what. . . Hate on someone because they want what you got and they can't get what you got cause they don't understand the concept of what what you are doing. In life, if you got HATERS, you doing something right!!
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I537 using Tapatalk
-
Hmmm........ It angers and saddens me to hear that someone can be so judgemental, but furries and scalies persevere
-
Baby, raise your head high. When people talk crap it's they feel you are better than them. I'm serious... Think about it. Haters will do what. . . Hate on someone because they want what you got and they can't get what you got cause they don't understand the concept of what what you are doing. In life, if you got HATERS, you doing something right!!
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I537 using Tapatalk
This :)
-
My opinion is that these people simply have ignorance on the matter. They don't understand something, they read about something and get their information from what they've read, it's just stigma. They aren't disliking the lifestyle you HAVE, they're disliking the lifestyle they THINK you have (which you don't have).
If they think it's weird it's because they're not used to it, that's fine.
If they hate it or think it's disgusting, it's because they've been misinformed.
It's nothing against you, it's just standard ignorance and misinformation, don't let it get to you, it's not relevant to you because he's not referring to you, he's referring to a person he's made up based on what he's read on encylopedia dramatica.
-
There's always going to be that one guy. It's like Anoni said, ignorance. And like Eclipse said, he feels like you're threatening his masculinity somehow. If he's saying "at least the ladies will see mine", consider he likely is not winning many hearts (that is a pretty douchey statement, anyway). But you already have earned a heart, Nobi. He doesn't know anything about you, and that's the problem. Honestly, so many things about what he said just scream "open mouth, insert foot." Because if he knew a bloody thing about your personal life, he'd be chewing on that thing for weeks.
Honestly, it's a lot like driving. Just let them cut you off waving that middle finger, they'll probably end up behind a cop at the next stop light, only to see you pull up behind them a couple seconds later. If not? Oh well, it's not like it really changed your ability to get to your destination.
They can assume all they want about you, Nobi, but the minute they actually meet you, they'll shut the hell up. No need to worry about it, because you have people who support you and your individuality. Listen to your music, love the things you love and enjoy life in the way you want to enjoy it. If someone hates you for it, that's their loss.
-
>.> These people truly are the downfall of the planet...
Remarks aside, what he said was TOTALLY uncalled for. People who say that are usually the ones needing masculinity themselves! Leave the comments to yourself buddy! The world does not need to know how Nobi has your tattoo, and that you made love to several women.
Nobi, the one thing I suggest is just let it blow by. Ignorance is, and always will be, on this planet, so from my personal experiences, just let him go away. He's not going to get brownie points for this, so why let it bother you? He's the one losing something. Comments like this lose friends and social status. If he keeps this up, NO women will see his tattoo.
-
Thanks, everyone. I'm really happy to have people to support and reassure me. :) I blocked the guy shortly after he left his comments, so I'll no longer have to see any crap from him.
And Orion, you're actually correct about him losing something: apparently he had a few more appointments scheduled with the artist, but the artist cancelled all of them and will no longer be doing any more tattoos for him (the artist told me this himself).
-
Good to hear it all worked out ^_^
-
Why care?
Dude's not worth your time.
Just ignore it.
-
Easier to hit than to love really, and he probably has some issues himself or sees something in you that he finds himself lacking in.