The Furry Forums
Furry Chat => Rants and Advice => Topic started by: Draco Vertolgr on May 28, 2012, 04:58:40 AM
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Recently Ive been with this amazing girl, we really like each other and I want to go out with her. we kinda are and are not at the same time if tht makes sense. Im 15 and shes 17. her parents dont want us dating because of the age difference wich to me is not tht bad. its only like 2-3 years differences but if it was 4-5 yea I could see a a problom lol. I like her so much and we still like each other, Im trying to take her to the movies saturday so we can hangout but I just hope things go well. I really like her, I dont want this to end :,( I dont know what to do, I like her alot. has anyone been in a smiliar situation or able to offer advice?
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I've been in a very similar situation, but I didn't know if the girl liked me or not (turned out she did.)
Best part is just to make it as natural as you can. Don't try to make it seem like a big deal of a date. Just a fun time out to hangout and such, and don't let yourself trip over your feet.
And really, I hardly hear about parents with age problems these days if it's just a couple years o.o
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Relax, be confident, breathe. That's the important thing, if it makes you feel better don't call it a date, just call it hanging out, with someone you really like!
As for the parents thing, well, you can still go out without them knowing and it is only a two years difference and technically (In Australia at least) it's completely legal (however you can't have... erm... "relations" until your a year older :P)
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You know in South Africa, you can marry anyone as long as you're over 16?
Beyond the point perhaps?
We're friends with one couple where the wife is older than the husband by 10 years.
I fail to see how two is a problem.
Especially with 2O year old women marrying 80 year old men. Sure it's for the money, still a bigger age gap.
I say good for you, but don't let it get you down.
Just be friends for now :D
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My grandfather is about 11 and a half years older than my grandmother...and they got married in '59 (a time where I would think that big age difference would be frowned upon).
If your parents have a problem with a two year age difference, then they have some serious issues. And honestly, they need to get over it. I might have been able to understand if the ages were switched and the girl was younger than you, but even that still wouldn't be a big deal. Maybe they're thinking of the legal side of things, but seriously, you're almost there anyway.
Shinzuu is four years older than I am and my parents never mentioned any issue with it when we started dating (I was 17, he was 21).
I would say keep hanging out with the girl and everything. Your parents will probably grow accustomed to it and forget their worries. Whatever they may be.
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I think they're also scared you'll get into things she'll drag you into such as drinking, drugs and such. I suggest that you try to show maturity in the relationship. Responsibility. What would happen if they met her in person? That usually helps to build an impression. If she clearly isn't that "dangerous type", that will probably calm them some.
Also, it's rather rare that 17 year old girls date 15 year old boys. Maybe they think she's a little strange for not going with guys her own age?
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I'd like to just throw in that my dad is 54 and his girlfriend is 31.
So, I really don't think that there is a problem with any age differences, two years is unbelievably small :P
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There's a huge difference between couples at that age, and a teenage "fling" (as parents probably see it). Huge. If you're only 15, you're not even old enough to run your own life, by law. They don't trust you to always make the best decisions. If you're 50, nobody can tell you what to do.
Don't forget the "Half-age-plus-seven rule". 17 / 2 = 8 + 7 = 15. Or... 54 / 2 = 27 + 8 = 35. It's an unofficial rule though, so you don't have to pay it any attention. However, it's seen as the "norm".
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Ok well my parents dont care anymore :) her parents still do. I was talking to a sorta friend sorta douche I want to beat to a pulp sometimes. He thinks Im weird for going out with "an emo girl who smokes pot and dose meth" 1st off douche she dose non of those things. 2nd she is not emo 3rd shut the **censor** up and stay out of it, but wait the stroy gets better he told almost the whole school about it. [removed]
Post Merge: June 01, 2012, 02:50:49 AM
Ok about the last post note tht I am usually a very peacefull person and tht recently Ive been dealing with allot
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Just make sure that he gets the first hit.
The more he beats you the better,
The more injured you get the more time of school you get.
Also go for the head.
However I do recommend you try deal with it peacefully first.
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I pushed him against the wall and thought for a brief minuite "the year is almost over why get suspended" so I droped him and left. I need to relax ughh X(
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You seem like a nice enough guy, but I think what you should do is just get your parents and her parents, and the both of you all to sit down and talk it out. Make a plan. Be willing to compromise, like if they say "No going out past 9:00" then you'd better be home by 8:45. Going behind their backs is only going to make them mistrust you more. If you can stand up to them, tell them why you care about her and that you're willing to talk it out, then you'll look mature and assertive. Blow your gasket, and you can kiss her goodbye.
Always remember if their final answer is no, then it means no.
If their final answer is no, then just stay friends with her for as long as it takes for them to come around. Prove to them that you can do this without getting into her pants or loosing your cool.