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Creative Arts and Media => Creative Writing => Topic started by: Defensivefurthewin on August 25, 2010, 10:11:14 PM

Title: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Defensivefurthewin on August 25, 2010, 10:11:14 PM
Post your favourite Chuck Norris jokes in here :D

I suppose I will start:
Chuck Norris once won a game of Connect Four in 3 moves.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: ƒyreblue ƒox on August 26, 2010, 03:04:42 PM
oh God, i had so many but i forgot most of them.

Chuck norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he never cries.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on August 26, 2010, 10:17:58 PM
Chuck Norris doesn't get frostbite, he bites frost.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

That's all I can remember for now.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Seko on August 27, 2010, 02:57:25 PM
when chuck norries does a push-up, he actually pushes the world down

chuck norris doesn't tell the time, he decides it.

all of mine >_<
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: ƒyreblue ƒox on August 27, 2010, 06:53:14 PM
heres another:
chuck norris went around the world in three days by foot. the first two days were spent drinking beer with God, and the last day sleeping.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: TailzWolf on August 28, 2010, 01:14:58 AM
All I can think of right now is these.

"There is no theory of evolution, just a list of species Chuck Norris has allowed to live"

"Helicopters are too slow for Chuck Norris, he just flies at 80mph with roundhouse kicks" or something like that XD
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on August 28, 2010, 08:00:42 PM
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: ƒyreblue ƒox on August 28, 2010, 09:30:49 PM
chuck norris found waldo
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Righteousbro on August 29, 2010, 03:43:09 AM
Chuck Norris once got into a heated argument with Stephen Hawkings over steady state theory. This is why he is in a wheel chair.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Seko on August 29, 2010, 07:51:04 AM
guns carry chuck norris for protection
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Crevan Fox on August 30, 2010, 03:47:07 PM
Chuck Norris can power Australia for 30 seconds using nothing but a roundhouse kick
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: TailzWolf on August 31, 2010, 12:32:42 AM
When Chuck Norris falls into water, he doesn't get wet; The water gets Chuck Norrised.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on August 31, 2010, 12:41:59 AM
Chuck Norris doesn't love Raymond.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: TailzWolf on August 31, 2010, 12:51:57 AM
Chuck Norris can kill 2 stones with 1 bird.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: serpington on October 07, 2010, 10:54:17 PM
a blind man bumped into chuck Norris and was miraculously healed!
...to bad the first, last and only thing he saw was a roundhouse kick.

chuck Norris challenged the sun to a staring competition, and one.

chuck Norris was in a car crash and died (highly unlikely...) when he and the other driver got to heaven
god asked the other driver "why do you deserve to enter heaven?"
the driver replied "i have been a good person all my life and have never done wrong."
"OK you may enter." god then turned to chuck and asked "why do you deserve to enter heaven?"
chuck Norris just looked up at him blankly "your in my seat....."
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Ares the Ram on October 12, 2010, 07:01:35 PM
My best one is innapropriate for here so i gotta go with this one

Chuck Norris can see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 13, 2010, 04:19:40 PM
I don't get it q.q
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Ares the Ram on October 13, 2010, 04:21:11 PM
you know how everyone cept kids cant see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch? CHuck norris can
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 13, 2010, 07:35:40 PM
O, *pity laugh* sorry
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: serpington on October 14, 2010, 11:08:37 AM
don't feel sorry.....its OK to not laugh. but remember if the joke isn't funny....MAKE A BETTER ONE!!
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on October 14, 2010, 11:41:03 PM
Jesus may be able to walk on water, but Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 15, 2010, 01:49:36 AM
I think I Heard that one

MLK might of had a dream, but Chuck Norris has a reality
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on October 15, 2010, 06:35:53 PM
Chuck Norris can make an onion cry.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 15, 2010, 06:44:02 PM
And that one

Chuck Noris, has caught them all
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Ares the Ram on October 15, 2010, 06:51:55 PM
Chuck Norris found waldo, then punched him
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on October 15, 2010, 06:55:01 PM
Superman and Chuck Norris once fought each other on a bet. The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 15, 2010, 06:57:12 PM
The grand canyon once was filled with water, Chuck Noris once got thirsty.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on October 15, 2010, 10:23:22 PM
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago. Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 16, 2010, 04:29:18 AM
Chuck Noris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Ares the Ram on October 16, 2010, 04:34:02 AM
Chuck Norris can open a jar of pickles. Without breaking it!
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: Self-sain on October 16, 2010, 04:37:04 AM
Not even a masterball can catch a Chuck Noris
Title: Re: <Completely Random> Best Chuck Norris Joke?
Post by: CrazyCat on October 16, 2010, 04:39:13 AM
If you spell Chuck Norris in scrabble you win. Forever.